Difficulty: Explorer (Level 1)
Nothing is worse than being blamed for something out of your control. It must feel like getting into trouble for no reason and like you just can’t win.
Sometimes, we hesitate to speak up if we have experienced being criticised. Perhaps you feel you have been punished before for speaking up or asking the “wrong questions”.
If you are comfortable enough, sit with your dad and tell him how you feel. You can say, “I was scared to make a mistake and felt I was not allowed to be wrong.” This could be because of past experiences, and you can tell him this.
You could role-play with your friends before this conversation. If speaking in person is too much, send him a text and then go to bed!
You can also try talking to another family member, such as another parent, a sibling, a grandparent or an aunt. They can help pass the message that you do not feel comfortable speaking up.
This question was answered by Katie Leung Pui-yan, a practising child and family therapist and partner at Therapy Partners.
